Should probably be recommended reading for penis-havers. Kerner lays forth in his book that PIV intercourse shouldn’t be the be-all and end-all, and that cunnilingus should be an integral part of sex, which he calls “coreplay.” Standing ovation from women everywhere! Something women obviously know, but many men are still unfortunately in the dark about.

“QUESTION: ‘Sometimes when I’m in the middle of going down on a woman, I feel like it’s never going to end. Is there any rule of thumb as to how long a cunnilingus session should last?’ (Jack, 32) ANSWER: Yes, there’s a very precise answer as to how long a cunnilingus session should last—as long as it takes to bring her to orgasm.”

And the crowd goes wild!!!

Enjoy a couple more highlights from this book that had me dying of laughter:

“Take one small lick for man, one giant lick for mankind. Cunnilinguists of the world unite. The revolution is upon us. Vive la Vulva!”

“Grab your dusty college Shakespeare off the shelf, commit a few lines to memory, and then use your tongue to iambically stimulate her clitoris. Your performance will surely garner a standing ovation.”

How will I ever think of Shakespeare and cunnilingus the same after a zinger like that?! The two will forever be indelibly linked in my mind.